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Top 11 Worst Games Ever (2003)

written by Shaun McCracken

Prepare to cringe. Last week, I asked people via the IGN board and an AOL message board, plus looked around some personal video game websites on what they thought what the worst game ever made was. Seeing how this isn't the most visited site, I was suprised on how many respones I got. I recieved at least 80 or more message board responses on the worst game ever, and on Game FAQ's I got lucky when someone else asked the question, and recorded those results. It may seem like I became despate for results to fill the list, but it was really to find some tie-breaker votes. Finally, I decided on what should go where, and I'm pretty satisifed with the list. Now, on to what you thought the worst games of all time were!

1. 11- Kabuki Warriors, Pubished 2002 for the X-Box: I've heard this was a really bad game. In fact, I believe Gamespot.com called it "abysmal". Kind of a strong word for an X-Box game. This sits further behind, due to it's newer status, and I believe there's worse than this. Still, I think lighting $50 on fire is more entertaining.

2. 10- Street Fighter The Movie, Published 1995 for the PS1 (and maybe the Saturn): Case in point on why some games based on movies shouldn't be made. But here's the funny part: this is a game based upon a movie that was based upon the game originally made by Capcom. This game has been refried more than a can of Rosarita beans. Could there be a worse concept?

3. 9- Total Recall, Published 1990 for the NES: Games based upon movie licenses rarely succeed, the real exceptions are GoldenEye, the N64 version of The World Is Not Enough and the recent Lord Of The Rings releases by EA Games. Total Recall is a perfect example of how to botch a movie license, and to brutally kill gameplay. And suprise, it was made by Acclaim, which had the worst publishing streak from about 1988-1996.

4. 8- Spice World, Published in 1998 for the PS1: What's worse, the Spice Girls getting their own game or the fact that the game was developed by the same company who did the WipeOut series? A little from column B and a lot from column A, thank you. The Sipce Girls run was from 1995-1997, and the game comes a year later. Maybe Spice World did come out in 1997, I don't know. I avoided this game like the Mad Cow Disease.

5. 7- Club Drive, Published in 1995 for the Atari Jaguar: I've never played the Jaguar. I probably would never want to, since the N64 was an actual 64-bit system, instead of the Jaguar masking a 16-bit console as a 64-bit one. But enough about Atari's final demise. I've read many Jaguar reviews from many sites on the web, simply because I found it a little facinating. And across the board, and with some of the vote, this is a terrible game. I've seen screenshots of this game. It makes the PS1 version of San Francisco Rush look like the arcade version of Daytona USA. Odd comparison. Honestly, this looks like Hard Driv'n in horrible settings with a lurid framerate. Stunt Race FX on the SNES was able to pull of more complexity than this.

6. 6- Carmageddon 64, Published in 1999 for the N64: This has to be one of the WORST looking N64 games of all time. The graphics are hideously blurry and nothing looks right at all. Also, the concept of Carmegeddon is just plain stupid, run over people for points. Well, that was a tad controversial, so we replaced the people with green-blooded aliens. This game ranks high on the "WTF?" factor.

7. 5- Shaq Fu, Published in 1994 for the SNES and Genesis: I don't even think if someone WERE to steal this game that it would be considered petty theft. In fact, I think this is the new Death Penalty in Montana, playing a game with a bad lead character and a worse manipulation of a title. Yeah Shaq, you're so cool and clever when you use your name as a pun. Ha ha. And I'm suprised to see this happen more than once (seen Radio Shaq, I mean, Radio Shack ads lately). This is literally bulls**t of the first degree, nothing more than cashing in in a name. Shaq Fu? Try Crap-Fu.

8. 4- Custer's Revenge, Published probably in 1980 for the Atari 2600: Do you think Custer's Revenge really has to do with history? Perhaps if dodging arrows to rape a tied up indian woman time over time, then yeah. While BMX XXX is the current purveour of bad taste, Custer's Revenge is so wrong on so many levels. First off, making a pornographic game on a family system. What were they thinking? I hope there was never "The Adventures Of Ron Jeremy" made for the NES (although some may do). Second, making a porno game on the Atari 2600 is just plain stupid. How do we get the connotation that this is porn? The 4x6 pixel rectangle extension from the character that we should assume is a penis? Third, who would enjoy this? Again, I guess the same could be said about BMX XXX. I can see why pornogames were never that popular.

9. 3- Extreme Paintbrawl 3, Published in 1998 for the PC: IGN gave this game one of THE lowest scores, if not the lowest on the site. I belive the score was a 0.7 out of 10. This game had quite a few votes, and one that was really never second guessed through tie-breakers. This game has more bugs than a sleazy Reno hotel, and less replay value than a run-over Cher CD. Ugly as hell, and damn near unplayable. Gee, what an experience.

10. 2- E.T., Published in 1982 for the Atari 2600 : You know a game is bad when it's mostly responsible for the collapse for an entire industry. E.T. was nothing more than a rushed effort, people saw the movie during the summer, and Atari knew people would want the game come Christmas time. Sadly, so many people returned this game, that E.T. couldn't be given away. E.T. probably now paves the I-15 freeway, which is of more use than it ever was. From this point on, people fear an E.T. game being made, for it may cause another collapse of the VG industry. Thank god Atari never finalized the rights to distribute the NES.

11. 1- Superman 64, Published in 1999 for the N64: This was the #1 worst voted game, and it was a clear winner by grabbing 40% more votes than E.T. This is a second entry by Titus in this list, the first was Carmegeddon 64. I'm suprised they still exist after this game. What made this game so bad? Some say it was the non-existent controls. Some say it was the lack of graphic detail. And what about the gameplay? Each screen shot I saw of this game looked like the training mode of the SNES Star Fox. You know the one where you fly throught the rings, and then shoot crappy cylinders towards the end. What could possess a developer to do so many wrong things in this game. And it wasn't like there was a push to get it out, either. This game was released in spring, so there was no "Christmas" deadline. I've seen student projects look much better than this, even my first 3-D projects looked better than this. If people still own this game, it's only to be used as a cheap paperweight.

    
    

    And that was the Top 11 Worst Games Ever, voted by many people across the web. I felt it was better to get a broader view, rather than my own bias, and I'm sure you'll agree. Untill then, take care.